Expectation is a funny friend. Two faced for sure. Intermittently, enticing and crippling. He often shows up at my New Year’s parties wearing fantastic outfits. This year I invited him in, but didn’t offer him champagne. He’s an ugly drunk.
I have a tendency to miss appreciating Life because I am enamoured by Expectation. I expect too much of myself, others, opportunities, the world, and I end up disappointed and shameful. But to not expect good things is to live resigned. How do I develop fair expectations without suffocating the desires that celebrate a satisfying life?
I watched Groundhog Day yesterday. Bill Murray’s character gets stuck in a purgatory of living the same day over and over again in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania. His life is full of disappointment, his career has not gone in the direction he hoped, nothing spectacular has amounted in any area of his life, and now he is stuck in a mundane small town for eternity. He tries to figure out how he can live the good life by manipulating the townsfolk for personal gain–manufacturing wealth, adventure and romance. Still discouraged he repeatedly tries to kill himself. It’s not until he gets bored with all of that, that he starts to recognize his new world and invest in it. That’s when he discovers his joy and, ultimately, his redemption. He thought he knew what he desired, but he discovered something he couldn’t have imagine.
I assume there is some special ground where grateful eyes see things plain and envision potential beauty. John Elderedge wrote, “You cannot out dream God. Desire is kept alive by imagination, the antidote to resignation. We need imagination, which is to say we need hope.” So, Expectation and I will be sitting down for some lovely teas this winter, imagining how we can develop and more healthy and fruitful friendship.
wow – sounds so familiar
Great blog!. Who is John Elderedge? In the last paragraph you might want to change “were” to “where’ if you can edit it. Loved the quote. Why was expectation masculine? Dad